Good Night Podcast
"Good Night" puts a smile on your face, tells you a bedtime story, chucks the day's problems, gives you a verbal back rub and tucks you in for a safe, sound, good night's sleep.
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Episode 570Oct 22, 2017Fantasies
Fantasies turn underwear into lingerie. Fantasies turn ordinary men and women into heroic movie stars, or dreadful villains. More importantly fantasies turn a relationship into a romance. A relationship builds over time, a romance just explodes. And a fantasy is usually the spark that ignites the explosion.
Like lots of our friends my Lady Wonder Wench and I have been together for a long time. It has been good...and comfortable...living together. Comfortable is good. But it's also risky. The risk is that if we aren't careful, the spark that ignited the explosion that changed our relationship into our romance can get lost behind all the trivia that piles up as the years go by. No spark...no explosion. No explosion...no romance.
Episode 569Oct 15, 2017Still Pulling An All Nighter
I'm sitting here in my big, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room ...and it's so comfortable. Not at all like the hard chairs and harsh fluorescent lights I remember from when I was doing the all night shows at WBZ and WNEW and WNBC.
There were good things and bad things about being on the air all night. One of the bad things was there weren't many people listening, but one of the good things was that the people who were listening were really listening. It wasn't just some kind of background noise like daytime radio tends to be.
And I remember that I had my own way of dealing with problems in those days. When the little voice in my head said, "You're going to regret saying this in the morning," I always said it anyway. Because I figured nobody could give me a hard time in the morning if I just slept late the next day. I felt that was one way to be a problem solver. No regrets. And I could sleep any time I had the time in those days...actually in those nights. Even while I was on the air. Sometimes much to the dismay of the tech on duty at the control board at about 3AM, I even took a quickie nap while a long song like Arlo Guthrie's "Alice's Restaurant" or Iron Butterfly's "In A Gadda Da Vida" was playing.
In those days...actually in those over nights...sleep was never a problem. Sleep was my little personal friend. I used to tell people, "The reason your eyes water when you yawn when you're awake, is that you miss your friendly little bed, and that makes you sad."
Episode 568Oct 08, 2017Angels Again
Angela is a special lady. My Lady Wonder Wench and I have known her for a long time. I call her "Angels." She has a problem with the beast right now. She can use whatever prayers and/or positive power thoughts you can send her. Today's podcast will give you an idea of the funny way we met. "Angels" is a good, tough, Brooklyn lady. If anybody can beat the beast, it's Angels. Please help. She's special.
Episode 567Oct 01, 2017Bunches Of Hunches
I'm guessing that just from the sound of my voice, you can tell where I'm recording this podcast. That's not a hunch, it's a guess. Because I've given you lots of hints over the years. There's a difference between a hunch and a guess. A guess has a lot of figuring out involved. A hunch just hits you. If I thought I had a shot at having my Lady Wonder Wench join me for a night of passion all those years ago based on the fact that she was smiling at me lot, twiddling with her hair, and standing very close to me that would be a good guess. That's not what happened. I took one look at her and my head exploded. That was what you could call a major league hunch. No figuring out at all.
There are bunches of important hunches in our lives that we usually don't notice. Lots of times it's because we tend to look at life through the wrong end of a telescope. For example, the stats say around a half of American marriages don't work out. That's awful. But take a closer look through the other end of that same telescope. According to that same stat, around half of American marriages DO work.
Episode 566Sep 24, 2017Exceptional Beats Perfect
I am sitting here in my exceptionally comfortable and manly black leather poppa chair in my living room. It now has a small streaky spot on the left arm rest where I spilled a little coffee a few mornings ago. So it is now exceptional as opposed to perfect. It's like lots of you who are listening to this podcast right now...many of you are also exceptional, but you're not perfect. And that's good. Because nobody is perfect, and you are not a nobody.
Episode 565Sep 17, 2017My Lust Lion
I am once again sitting here in my big, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room, and let me tell you it's a lot more comfortable than the seat at gate D15 at Philadelphia airport where I was stuck a few weeks ago because of another cancelled flight. I told you a few podcasts back that the airlines are screaming for pilots because 96% of American pilots are guys, and in the last 30 years, young guys have had a 52% drop in testosterone which as you know is a key ingredient in being a guy. And although women don't have much testosterone, they have mostly estrogen which seems plentiful enough, but they aren't stepping up to fill the gap. They're not becoming pilots. And that's a major reason the airlines keep cancelling flights. Not enough pilots.
Lots of people are making sex pretty complicated these days, and God bless them too. But not me. I like the simple fact that I'm one sex and my Lady Wonder Wench is the other. I'm a simple guy. I'm a simple guy but I have some complicated parts. I also explained a few podcasts ago about my lower reptilian brain. Everybody has a lower reptilian brain, including you. Even if you're a woman. That's one of the very few things I know about women. They have a lower reptilian brain just like guys do.
Scientists say your lower reptilian brain is part of your limbic system. I like to think of mine as kind of a friendly little wee beastie. I call my wee beastie lower reptilian brain Rumplestilskin Pharfenugen. Pharf for short. In case you slept through brain surgery class, your lower reptilian brain is responsible for some of the biggest troubles you get into. Instead of being just a wee beastie, your lower reptilian brain sometimes becomes a WHEE Beastie. That's when you hear guys saying things like, "Watch this". And "Bring itâ€¦let's see what you've gotâ€¦bring it" to the biggest guy in the bar. And "Hello my dear. Your place or mine?"
Episode 564Sep 10, 2017Wind Your Watch
Please keep this podcast around for the next time you get so OUTRAGED that you're tempted to do something you'll regret. "Wind your watch" Mike said...between clenched teeth. Mike was my first flight instructor all those decades ago. His teeth were clenched because I had the plane stalled. It was pointed straight down and it was starting to spin, and I was reaching like a mad man for buttons and switches and pulling on levers...instead of THINKING.
Mike was teaching me a pilot saying that goes: "When you notice that one wing just fell off, the first thing to do is to wind your watch." It's a reminder that it's not a good idea to just throw a bunch of switches and pull a lot of levers until you take a breath, and actually understand what needs to be done...THEN DO IT.
Remembering to wind your watch is one way to break the momentum of fear, and it gives you a chance to get things back under reasoned control. It was a hard lesson well learned. Thanks Mike. Mike probably had to wind his watch at least ten times to keep from just grabbing the controls that day.
I think we're at a "Wind your watch" time in America right now. This never was, isn't now, and never will be a political podcast. I don't like politics. I mentioned a few podcasts ago, that "Politics" is a "Fortune cookie word." You can break open a fortune cookie word, and read the message inside. Break the word "Politics" apart and you get "Poli" which means many, and "Ticks" which are small blood sucking insects. In many cases the message inside the word politics fits lots of folks in Washington very well.
Episode 563Sep 03, 2017Getting Over Growing Up
I am sitting here in my big, manly, comfortable black leather poppa chair in my living room...enjoying the fact that I have gotten over GROWING UP. That's a surprising statement from a guy who spent most of his life fooling around on the radio. So what made me say it? I figured out a little test for how you can tell you're getting over growing up today, and I passed it. Here's what I mean.
Can I open my own peanut butter jars? Yes. Do I really understand how my car is going to get through a tiny little tunnel way up the road ahead? Yes. Can I can buy all the toys I want...within reason? Yes. Just no personal jets. And I can recognize that even if there are nasty things under my bed, I'm not afraid to go to sleep. And speaking about being afraid, I have come to the definite conclusion that it is better to be scared than to be bored. I have far more often regretted what I didn't do than what I did do in getting over growing up.
Episode 562Aug 27, 2017Too Sexy For Studies
No, no, no, no. I do not believe this report from Harvard University. I'm trying hard not to fall out of my big, manly, black leather poppa chair while I'm laughing from reading this thing. This report says "Posting views on Facebook and other social media sites delivers a powerful reward to the brain similar to the pleasure from food and sex." No, no, no guys...that may be true...but only if you have food and sex while you're wearing your fully buttoned up, tight fitting white lab coat.
There is something wrong with that study. And there are all kinds of studies like that these days. Dr. Gay Guzinski, M.D. of the American College of Obstetricians published a study just now that says, "Women who are multi orgasmic can and do remain so for their entire lives." So how does he know that? The only way he would know that for sure is if he spends way too many nights working late with his intern whose name is Desiree. It's all in the name of science...of course.
Doctors, doctors, doctors...un-button your tight fitting white lab coats and try the experiment again following Dr. Guzinski's lead. I think you will find that when you have wandered into a ladies' erogenous zone, she will often smile, purr, and writhe all at once. And I guarantee you'll notice that. Some ladies even say something in a romance language...something like "WHOOPIE."